I tried, but I couldn’t bring myself to tell you about my day. I am sorry. You should know that my voice gets caught in my chest somehow. All I want to do is tell you everything. All I want to do is to save you from me. I am in pain. I keep having to relearn that good things can affect me badly, and I am lost trying to navigate my way through the mess in my head. The days seem so bleak and I don’t feel alive though I know I am. Every time I think or talk to you my internal voice seems to scream “Help me, please,” on repeat. All you know, and all I can ever say are those words that seem to hurt me the most, “I’m okay.”
I appreciate you.